DVD Review: Backwoods: Haylie Duff, Ryan Merriman, Danny Tucci, Marty Weiss: Movies & TV

Jul02

DVD Review: Backwoods: Haylie Duff, Ryan Merriman, Danny Tucci, Marty Weiss: Movies & TV

Posted by admin | on 2 July, 08:27 PM

Product Description
A group of friends embark on a camping trip for a ten-year high school reunion. Their celebration soon turns into a battle for survival when they realize that the locals, who are not what they seem, are hunting them down. It s a terrifying and white-knuckled experience you won t ever forget.

Nothing you haven’t seen before, but at least it is watchable,

By Daniel Jolley “darkgenius” (Shelby, North Carolina USA) -
(TOP 50 REVIEWER)

I didn’t have high expectations for this movie. To my way of thinking, the world already has more than enough B-horror movies featuring a group of young people going out into the woods and being attacked by a bunch of dirty, disgusting backwoods cretins. To make matters worse, the characters in this film are all taking part in a corporate team-building retreat (not a reunion - the information in the editorial review is less than accurate), a practice I consider to be one of the most infernal ideas mankind has ever come up with. And wouldn’t you know it? These young video game company executives turn out to be among the most annoying people on the planet. Only two have any redeeming qualities whatsoever, the one dude who isn’t really in to all of the kissing up and debauched camaraderie (Ryan Merriman) and the hot girl who’s sort of uncomfortable with her jerk boss’s constant touchy-feely sessions with her (Haylie Duff). To my surprise, the film actually grew some legs somewhere in the middle - but not enough to really win me over. In the end, a complete lack of originality consigns Backwoods to the ranks of the slightly below average. Think Wrong Turn meets The Hills Have Eyes, and you’ll pretty much have Backwoods all figured out.

I wasn’t sure what to make of the name Tom Alan Smithee being given to a character (and a minor character, at that). As most B-movie buffs know, “Alan Smithee” is the name film directors use when they know they’ve made a real stinker and don’t want their real names associated with the project. Maybe the character name is just a coincidence, but the fact that Smithee and his girlfriend turn up on Missing posters as having last been seen on February 30 seems to indicate that the script writer may have had a sense of humor about the whole thing. (Unfortunately, these in-jokes are the only creative aspects of the entire film.)

So our stereotypical characters all go out to the middle of nowhere to play paintball, hone their “executive tactics,” and have their teamwork skills reviewed by their obnoxious boss. Being hot-shot executives and all, they happily set up camp in what they know is a restricted area that used to house some sort of military installation. The one unhappy camper among them soon notices all of the obvious evidence that they’re not alone, but no one wants to listen to his party pooping warnings. The next thing you know, the gang is besieged by a group of religious fanatics who proceed to beat the crap out of the six guys while preparing the two females for use in increasing the local nutjob population.

Backwoods was apparently produced for Spike TV, so don’t expect to see much in the way of blood and gore. (Needless to say, there’s no nudity whatsoever.) Some old-fashioned traps make the chase scenes through the forest somewhat interesting, but I pretty much relied on Haylie Duff’s hotness to get me through the film’s 80 minute runtime (although I must admit I got quite a kick out of watch a mortally wounded techie put on an amazing show of shooting bad guys without even aiming.) If you’re a horror fan, Backwoods is certainly a watchable film, but you won’t see anything here you haven’t seen before.

Killer Hicks In The Woods X Fifteen,

By BO BO BOB “WESLEY” (JACKSON, MS) -

This wasn’t just a few degenerate hicks gone homicidal in the woods. This was an entire compound of hicks gone homicidal in the woods, wanting to procreate. Must have ran out of farm animals. Since most of these movies are the same, what makes them worth watching is the acting. This one was a little different. For one thing it had that Howling 1 movie werewolf chick as the head of the hick family. With all of those relatives though, one of them could have bought her some Rogain though. One thing missing though was a good end-of-the-movie one-on-one fight for survival between the protagonist lead male or female and either the big hulking hick or the head hick ranger. You could have had both-the protagonist female fight against the Rogaine deficiant head antagonist female and the lead protagonist male fight against the two antagonist males. The acting was good, as was the violence, although I would have pushed the neurotic screaming chick off the top of the cliff. She got on my nerves.

The little differences in this movie, made it pretty good when compared to similar films. I am a huge fan of young unknowns in these types of films. Too many killers in such films can dilute the concentration of the viewers, just as too many victims can. The “survival in the woods” theme is always a plus. Doubt if their will be a sequel , buit this was worth buying.

Get it? … Backwoods?,

By Matt “- MCWHAMMER -” (Denver, NC) -

I hope beyond all hope, every time I watch this kind of movie, that something new will be brought to the table. Something I haven’t seen before, even if it’s just a twist ending. However, when you name your movie after a practical horror genre, it can only mean one of two things. You’re either sending up the “inbred redneck” genre, or you’re just adding to the endless list. Backwoods is the latter. The only shred of plot divergence here is that the group of psycho’s are living on a former military reservation, and somehow think the land belongs to them. So when a group of fatigue-wearing paintball players comes walking into their “territory”, naturally, they take offense. This may be new to someone who hasn’t seen any of the hillbilly maniac movies, but the plot is almost exactly the same.
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